Springer Fever

Posted by Bryan Wolf on May 25th 2023

Springer Fever

Diagnosis, Symptoms, and Treatments

This article looks at the diagnosis, symptoms, and treatments for Springer Fever. Zombies, or the undead, generally share similar characteristics no matter the origin story or Hollywood production; a lack of free will and being wholly subordinate to an overwhelming desire. These figures often smell like rotting flesh, and walk in hoards in what would appear to be an aimless direction. These figures are thought to suffer from an infection or fever that affects the brain. The infected there-in lose control of free will and will do absurd or often unthinkable things.

The main side effect of Springer Fever is the overwhelming desire to hike the Appalachian Trail and most often a specific draw to Springer Mountain in Georgia. The draw to this one specific mountain is currently undetermined as it is hardly noteworthy. As the fever takes hold, individuals begin to look unkempt, have an uncontrollable stench, walk long distances without awareness of their surroundings, and have an increased appetite that is seemingly unending. The infected have been seen in towns near the trail eating inhuman amounts of ice cream. When in remission, victims of Springer Fever often admit that they were miserable with their surroundings, often in pain, and had an eerie sense that it was constantly raining.

While there is not a consensus from the medical community, Springer Fever seems to infect those that have been on the Appalachian Trail and is more common with those that have spent a considerable amount of time on the trail. In rare cases Springer Fever has been known to infect individuals that have never been on the AT or even live states away. Springer Fever is considered to be contagious even when in remission.

Our Springer Fever T-shirts and stickers serve as a warning for those that dream of a wilderness experience in Appalachia. If you feel pulled to the Appalachian Trail it is recommended that you immediately consult your RRT specialist for a diagnosis. If you currently or have already suffered from Springer Fever know that there is a temporary cure. You must fulfill the passion filled desire as much as you can, for as long as you can. Upon coming home and eating real food and sleeping in a real bed you will immediately be cured of this unreasonable desire. But beware, it is likely to return next Spring.

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